Why He’s Hot:

  1. Okay so Alan Rickman is old enough to be your dad—maybe even grandfather. Does it really matter? Have you heard his voice? We’ve bought yards of velvet just to rustle it around to see if it really does sound like Alan. It does. Forget porn, we’ll just listen to him read the dictionary.
  2. If you don’t want to do him yet, just watch this, and you will. You can thank us later for that orgasm.
  3. He’s in HARRY POTTER. You can pretend you haven’t had fantasies about Professor Snape punishing you for bad behavior. We’d kill if that meant a spanking from our favorite teacher.
  4. He plays the hot bad guy and the sensual heartthrob. Can you say: fuckk mee? He can sport a beard or be clean shaven, we don’t care as long as he’s banging us.
  5. Not ony is he ridiculously sexy, he’s funny. What else goes better with intelligence and good looks? Oh we know, the family guy factor. Maybe it’s a daddy thing but we love his committment to long time girlfriend Rima Horton. He can tuck us in any night 😉 Ah, fuck that shit, we just want him in bed.


Yes. Yes. Yes. Agreed.